Two doctors opened an office in a small town.

Two doctors, a psychiatrist and a proctologist, opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors".

Two doctors, a psychiatrist and a proctologist, opened an office in a small town and put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors".

The town council was not happy with the sign, so the doctors changed it to read: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids."

This was not acceptable to the council either, so in an effort to satisfy the council, they changed the sign to "Catatonics and High Colonics."
No go.

Next, they tried: "Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives."
Thumbs down again.

Then came: "Minds and Behinds"
Still, no good.

Another attempt resulted in: "Lost Souls and Butt Holes."
Unacceptable to the town council... again!

So they tried: "Analysis and Anal Cysts."
Not a chance. Too graphic, said the council.

"Nuts and Butts?"
Definitely not.

"Freaks and Cheeks?"
Shot down again

"Loons and Moons?" 
Forget it.

Almost at their end of thinking capacity, the doctors finally came up with: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Odds and Ends."
And everyone was happy.

The Love Dress: "A Cautionary Tale to Aging Men..."

The Love Dress : A Cautionary Tale

A woman stopped by, unannounced, at her son's house.
She knocked on the door and then immediately walked in. She was
shocked to see her daughter-in- law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was
playing, and the aroma of perfume filled the room.

"What are you doing?!" she asked.
"I'm waiting for Mike to come home from work," the daughter-in- law answered.
"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.
"This is my love dress," the daughter-in- law explained.
"Love dress? But you're naked!"
"Mike loves me and wants me to wear this dress," she explained. "It
excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly
becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can't get enough of me."
The mother-in-law left.
When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume,
dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD, and laid on the couch, waiting for
her husband to arrive. Finally, her husband came home.
He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"This is my love dress." she whispered sensually.
"Needs ironing," he said. "What's for dinner?
He never heard the gunshot.